The results are in!

99.99% conclusive, too.

I'm not the liar. I wasn't a whore. I wasn't a slut.

Probably the biggest question should be from his wife...WHY did I never hold him to the fire? Then again, maybe she already knows the answer.
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Vacation: Day 2

Today really feels like fall. It's cloudy, but not raining. It's quite cool...Levi's, shirt AND hoodie! No shorts or capris.

What a PERFECT day for picking up my kid and going shopping!

Especially since I seem to be breaking every Web site I need...DNA Testing results are down and CO-OP Network has a glitch in their Find ATM form.

Probably a good time to get outta Dodge, eh? (Get it, I'm getting outta Dodge in my Dodge...that was a FUNNY! Dang, what a tough crowd.)

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Updating the plan

Slight glitch called the entertainment center. 500 lbs fully loaded. But the couch is done and so are the DVDs! I'm just not too inspired to do much else right now. Maybe I'll make a batch of oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. And watch for RESULTS?

And wait for Rick to come home, so he can help me move The Beast!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

VACATION: DAY ONE

OBJECT: Relocate couch **two feet** to wall

Need to move:

the recliner into family room [DONE]

DVD library into dining room

9'x6' solid oak entertainment center over 2 feet, also

Must buy these lamps and this table for behind our 6-piece sectional couch, near the front door. And I'm probably going to buy new moss green curtains for the picture window, with moss green throw pillows for the couch.

Probably next week, we are going to start building the bar in the family room. Let's hope my nephew comes down to pick up the couch and loveseat ASAP!

Did mention I bought a new kitchen table yesterday at my fave consignment shop? We don't like the light wood finish, so I'm going to redo it deeper and darker. And then, make new placemats for it. Yes, MAKE!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Gettin' it right the first time

In just a few days, Karina will be 18-years-old! How times flies...

She could have screwed up ALOT and blamed it on The Lack of Marriage Btwn Her Biological Parents. It's always an easy out for kids of divorce. Huh...how do I know that gem? teehee

Karina makes parenting look easy to the younger crowd I know. She's NOT typical, I try to explain. How many kids call mom at work because there wasn't a chore list left for after school? How many moms have to search their daughters bedroom looking for their "borrowed" capris, shoes, etc.?

And the whole driving issue? Oh, please! WHO ELSE DEALS WITH THAT?!!?

There's never been a temptation to press my luck. As the youngest of 4 kids, I always joked that either my parents decided to stop with my birth because they finally got it right...or they were done trying!

With Karina, my only child, I can say, "I GOT IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!"

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Goodnight, Mr. Newman

Paul Newman died yesterday. He was one of those actors who never seemed to get old. He may have played old codgers, but he just never got old. Even at 83.

I remember going to see The Color Of Money when it came out. Tom Cruise? Blah! Paul Newman was a MAN!

Several years ago, I caught Cool Hand Luke on a pay station. That is a movie that I can never pass by again. If I see it, the channel flipping is DONE.

Likewise, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid is a timeless movie. Came out the year before I was born, the year we landed on the moon, but I'd rather watch it than most of the movies on TV. And it's not just for the beautiful landscape of Zion National Park and Durango, CO.

BTW, thank you, Mr. Newman, for all the charity work/foundations you started over the years. You stuck with it.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

To be or not to be...I'm not surprised!

1. Clay Aiken is gay. DING DING! So is Lindsay Lohan. Maybe.
2. George Michael got busted for drugs AGAIN.
3. It's not just Michigan's economy in the toilet.
4. The CDC is touting flu shots.
5. And Dylan is the father of Kelly's little boy.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Instead of hating Kris right now, I pity him.

He's absolutely right that this should have been dealt with 18 years ago. Unfortunately, he wasn't that brave.

Should I have forced him? No. That anger, resentment and game-playing wasn't something she needed to experience first-hand. She saw it enough with Cody!

Karina didn't need to be put through that garbage. It wasn't "in her best interest" to be a paycheck.

Through everything, she grew up to become a wonderful young lady who is hellbent on NOT following her mother's path. Marriage, kids...those will wait until she is well out of college and into her career. If they happen at all!

Kris missed out on watching a great kid grow up. Hopefully, he won't miss out on this family...but he made his bed.



The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Talking behind his back

I mean, who believes ANYTHING on the Net, right?

Paternity test results will be posted as soon as they go live. Thanks, Bethany!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

On the FARK scale

Not sure if the following would be IRONIC or ASININE or DUMBASS:

The only "gift" Kris has ever bought Karina is the paternity test, which he prays will prove he didn't help concieve her.

Next on the FARK scale: FAIL
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

It is done.

Karina finally got to see the other 1/2 of her genetics yesterday. Face to face.

Her reaction? "No wonder I'm so short! Short people shouldn't be allowed to mate together!" Except the Roloffs, she admitted.

Seriously, though. Rick didn't go, but Kris' wife came along. I fully expected it, she obviously doesn't trust him. Maybe there's more than just this?

Karina and I both agreed we liked B. She was very cordial to us, but she SEETHED at Kris.

B had bought the test the night before. I trusted her enough to use it, since it was still sealed. Obviously, she wants answers, the truth. It was in her eyes.

Unfortunately, it was obvious their marriage depends on these results. It hasn't been just her husband lying (by omission) to her, but his entire family. I am sorry she is having to deal with all of this now, but that isn't my fault. The hurt and anger she feels isn't from me or Karina, it's from her husband. I don't want to hurt her, which explains my quietness. I didn't ask her how she likes living in MY HOMETOWN.

How he behaved yesterday to Karina and me is how he will be to her and their child(ren) one day. And he will probably tell her one day he did do their DNA test in a Kroger parking lot, too.

The envelope was mailed yesterday. They paid the $119.95 processing fee. The results will be available online at www.dnatesting.com approx 3-5 biz days after they receive it. About this time next week, I'll be sending around the info for your viewing.

As for the medical history? I still have no guarantee that he will provide it. Not to worry, once the results are back showing 99%, I'll be in touch for that info!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

He called

The other 1/2 of Karina's gene pool called me a few days ago. Kris was QUITE emotional. And extremely ignorant. He tried to threaten me with costly legal action to force a paternity test. Or, I had to promise to meet him at a CVS "of my choice" for a Paternity in a Box test.

Kris kept calling me a liar. Claimed he's tired of "living this lie" for the past 18 years.

That's pretty funny, because he seemed surprised when I said she was just days away from turning 18. And when I tried to speak with him 3 months ago about medical history, he claimed he didn't know me or Karina, yada yada.

And he hasn't "lived with" anything, he never even tried to accept responsibility! He was the victim then, still trying to play that deck of cards now.

Kris doesn't want a relationship with Karina. He won't go on her birth certificate. He won't pay child support. He's praying that Paternity In A Box will set him free, but it won't.

My assistant was in my office when his call came in and she listened to it without difficulty. She worried about him in such a crazed state.

I'm betting he got busted by his wife. Was it my letter mailed to his work? Talking about the child he had created 18+ years ago with me. That's a pretty huge thing to keep from the wife. What is even better is that he moved her to MY hometown. Poor lady! They bought a house and have a family in MY hometown where my sister lives, my brother (may still) live. My classmates, etc. Was he hoping that I'd move back and he'd be able to watch my daughter grow up from afar?

Seriously, I loved the part where he tried to threaten me with court. That's darn IGNORANT. Karina was legally adopted years ago and he never stepped in then!

He flat-out refused to promise medical history "if" the test showed him to be tied to her genetically. Nope, he "cross that bridge if it comes to it." He wants this just for himself. Or maybe, his marriage?

What he doesn't understand is that once he starts down this road, it's not a dead-end. He has kids. Karina, technically, has 1/2 siblings. How will he explain her to them? The child he abandoned? The child he wanted aborted? It is very likely his kids will worry about him abandoning them.

Karina and I agreed to the test, but not as quickly as he tried to demand. She's away at school. I work a real job (not just for daddy's seasonal company.) It will take some coordination for the 3 of us to get together. And it will be on OUR time table, not his.

He is the only person who has something to lose, and nothing to gain. He won't be gaining a daughter. Thanks to me, she never had a bad opinion on him...until we needed medical history. Now, she knows he's a pathetic jerk.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Monitoring homeschooled kids

Monitoring homeschooled students may seem like a good idea, but it will just lead to more regulation and more expenses. When I homeschooled Karina back in the '90s, I didn't register on religious beliefs, etc. I took her out of school in first grade for lack of safety by the school.

That was truly an awesome experience for us. It was great to watch her learn, to teach her myself. Witness her growth. We had books and workbooks and went on field trips to the zoo, Greenfield Village, parks, etc.

I remember the day we went to sign her back into public school. The new principal said she had to be tested in basic subjects and warned that Karina probably wouldn't be placed into the 3rd grade. "Most homeschooled kids aren't where they should be."

Karina tested for an hour while I waited. She ended up scoring in the 3rd grade for just 1 subject, Math. The others were 5th, 7th and 11th grades! Literally, her reading was on the 11th grade level!

Do you think the public school put her ahead with those scores? Ah, no. That's what worries me, as homeschoolers become more known, they will be subject to mandatory testing, like public school kids.

Karina has several friends at college who were homeschooled. They are studying to be doctors and lawyers. They are having no problem with adjusting to a freer college schedule, unlike some of the public schooled kids.

Register? Why waste the funds?

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Let's talk about food!

For the first time in my life, I made tomato sauce from scratch. Not just any tomato sauce, but a tasty addition to our stuffed peppers. And every single tomato came from OUR garden and is completely pesticide-free!

I am in the midst of freezing ears of corn for a winter delicacy. And contemplating attempting salsa.

Speaking of delicacy, foie gras sounds pretty and yummy, but it is the liver of a force-fed goose. Kinda makes it gross to think about tubes stuck down a goose's throat. (Did you know geese don't have a gag reflex?)

I'd much prefer to keep my force-fed poultry to mutant chickens with 4 lbs of boneless, skinless breasts. And I buy them at Meijer or Kroger!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Family reunions brought to you by YouTube

It was interesting to see my mother's youngest brother after (quick finger count)...

25 YEARS!

Thanks to a racist scandal, which my "uncle" is spearheading a recall on a city council member, I was treated to "seeing" him in a local TV station piece.

Seriously, I'd NEVER recognize him by face. He's in his 50s now and lots of grey hair. He's not a small man. He's big and burly, which makes his Mickey-Mouse voice all the funnier!

Especially when he is declaring his pride in being Mexican.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Family first? First Family?

The Palins are the type of parents I despise. They have turned their kids into their babysitter. Ever notice Sarah, nor her husband, don't carry "their" 4-1/2 month old infant? Ever notice it's the daughters who hold the baby during speeches and photo ops?

I saw parenting delegation too much with Karina's friends. Their parents decided to start a younger family, so Karina's friends were babysitter while mom and dad worked FT, went out at night and went away for the weekend.

You know, because mom and dad needed "their time."

One very intelligent young lady almost had to give up a FULL scholarship to Michigan Tech because her parents needed her to babysit her 2 younger sisters, the oldest is starting kindergarten!

Of course, this may be interpretted as a sexist view, except I am condemning BOTH mom and dad here. I'm not claiming that she needs to REALLY put her "family first" since she is supposedly breastfeeding a 4-1/2 month old with Down Syndrome and has a pregnant 17-year-old.

Actually, I see Sarah Palin as putting "family first" far below her "First Family" aspirations.

A sexist view? How about I quote Sarah Palin's joke from last night...What's the difference btwn pitbulls and hockey moms? Lipstick.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

I'm bored

I came home today without my dog. Daddy kept him Up North with him, instead. I have to work long days, Daddy is off work this week. No brainer.

It's so much more strange for me to not have a dog to walk, feed, water or pet for a few days, than not having Rick or Karina around! Them being gone is just fine for me, but no Niko is beyond boring.

Seriously, no dog to greet me at the door is a bit unnerving. Checking the mail alone is almost freakishly silent!

I miss my dog!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Somebody made a BIG boo-boo

Initially, Gov. Palin was an interesting choice by McCain's advisors. Trying to woo the shallow people who were interested only in voting the Vagina card.

But it backfired.

The rumors about her 4-1/2 month old infant possibly being her GRANDCHILD weren't shallow. Families should be off-limits, but the circumstances are pretty incredulous.

Gov. Palin admits she didn't bother to inform her own staff until she was 7 months along. And she never looked pregnant, even when she gave birth a month early.

What I found most disturbing was the conversation she recounted about her doctor telling her about the baby's Down Syndrome. She never considered letting her husband be a part of the discussion?!!?

Mind you, I didn't have a husband/boyfriend around when I was pregnant for that kind of stuff, but I still find it weird.

Then, she gave birth a month early and went back to work 3 days later. 3 DAYS?!!? With a special needs NEWBORN?

And her 16-year-old daughter was out of school with mono for 5 months? While Gov Palin was hiding her pregnancy.

Even better was today's admission that her daughter is currently pregnant. Now, Gov. Palin has a 4-1/2 month old infant, a 17-year-old daughter with a baby on the way AND possible VP of the USA?

I know Republican honchos were hoping Gov. Palin would show family values, but even though her daughter is having the baby and supposedly marrying the father, but it's still an embarrassment. There's always the possibility of divorce and that ugliness.

YIKES! Who can't see that one coming?

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)