Crinkles, no wrinkles

Growing up, I was allowed to wear makeup. My mom's only rule was "keep it from looking like a clown."

In high school, I used eye shadow, eyeliner, Chapstick, lipstick, lip gloss and blush. Occasionally, mascara.

By the time I was 21, my makeup regimen was down to lipstick and Chapstick.

Probably about 1997, I pretty much had ditched the lipstick. Chapstick is ALWAYS in my purse, though.

It seems like there has been quite a bit of talk at work lately about wrinkles. I'm late 30s, but don't have even the starting of crows feet or forehead crinkles. It's been noticed and I've been asked for my "secret."

I don't exfoliate, since it intensifies my rosecea (which is easily treated with Clearasil or Eucerin.)

I don't moisturize.

I don't wear makeup. Seriously, I've worn foundation only a handful of times in my entire life! Never, ever tried "concealer," either.

My skin is FAR from perfect. I do get a zit once in a while. It's not shiny and fake-porcelain-like Nicole Kidman. Botox and Revlon are NOT my friends.

Admittedly, I don't smoke, but am very conscious of my expressions. My face is left au natural. I sleep on a satin pillowcase. I drink water and exercise. It seems to be enough with my genetics.

And my self-esteem.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

SNOPES is our friend

In this day and age, it's hard to believe how many urban legends I receive from family (Rick and mine.)

Have they never heard of SNOPES?

The big target right now is Barack Hussein Obama. He gets it for his names (middle and last), he gets it for his dad's religion (Muslim), he gets it for being a black man seeking the presidency.

Of course, the people who send the stupid e-mail claim they are not "prejudiced." They just "didn't know" it was an urban legend. Um, yeah, TRY THE NEWS!

My favorite response is a SNOPES link (to the UL) and a snarky, "Did you win any international lotteries lately?"
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Not all the nuts are gone from the airlines

It's not really a bad idea for the airlines to stop giving out their "free snacks."

The tiny bag of nuts they gave was more insulting than filling! The entire package was literally smaller than my debit card AND less than 1/2 full!

When Kar and I flew to Vegas recently, I brought along snacks in my carry-on. We had licorice, granola bars, gummy bears and candy bars, along with single-serve bags of Cheetos. We were very happy with our selection.

It just took a few minutes of shopping and packing, but they sure worked great for a cheapie breakfast!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Not exactly a skeleton in the closet

Of course, it is weird to admit that I wrote my obit many moons ago, and update it yearly. My wish to be an organ donor and cremated is very well-known to my husband.

He was less than thrilled to know that I'd already thought death through. When he balked at promising to fulfill my wishes, I gave him the alternative.

He is even less enthused over my promise to sign up for Bodies The Exhibit.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Jamie

My heart and prayers go out to Jamie's family and friends.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

DOPLAR doesn't beat common sense

I seriously believe our weatherman is on crack.

He was COMPLETELY off-base every single day this week. We were talking how he just needs to look out the window, because he isn't close on "current conditions," let alone "future forecast!"

(Several of my coworkers who live just a few blocks from the station studio agree, so it's not like I'm judging him off-base from 20 miles away! Others just refuse to watch him, he doesn't even match the other TV stations in the area! The previous woman who did it spoke REALLY slow, like everyone must be mentally challenged. She also wore flannel shirts on the air?!!?)

Can you think of any other job that pays someone to be wrong almost constantly? How likely is it that YOU'D have a job with the success rate of a weatherman?
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

No slots, but maybe an arcade?

We are here in the mini-hospital, Kar is getting her (hopefully) last steroid infusion. She's laying in the bed and reading, I'm sitting next to her and typing on the laptop. They have WIFI! And Walgreens in their parking lot!

It's weird to visit hospitals that have WIFI and real restaurants. They remind me more of an airport concourse than a serious place.

Except the beds. Vegas had tons of slot machines at their airport, but not a single bed!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

My hometown

I'll be in MC this weekend for the festival and heading to PH to see one of my best friends, Bethany.

Maybe Bruce in the CD player for the drive?
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Until Monday, I couldn't even spell, "ophthalmologist"

It's hard to believe that our lives have been turned upside down. Then twisted inside-out. Even worse is being told that Kar's diagnosis can't yet be made, but we "will just have to wait for the other shoe to drop." Could be next week or next month or next year or in 5 years or 15...I hate looking at my daughter and wondering, "how long?"

Kar had more DR appts in the 5 DAYS than in the last 12 YEARS. And she will double that number THIS week.

It's hard to believe she will now have quarterly appts with her opthalmologist and neurologist. And quarterly MRIs (with contrast.) And all this is covered under regular health insurance, not optical insurance.

It's shocking that Kar even HAS an ophthalmologist...and NEUROLOGIST!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Where's the 12-step group?

Let's face it, Kar and I will NEVER have enough bookshelf space.

We are both bookaholics.

She has 3 bookcases in her room, one is 5' tall! I have 3 that are 5' and 4 that are 3' tall. Plus, I use every inch available in our DVD collection bookcases!

We hate getting rid of ANY books. Still, we give our "discards" and dupes to several Library Friends clubs for their fundraising efforts. Of course, we buy quite a few books from those sales, too!

We have entire author series and collections, like Rowling and Grisham. Our selections range like Barnes and Noble: finance, romance, books in Spanish, biographies, self-help, religion, ___ for Dummies. There are classics like Hamlet and Tom Sawyer, and pure fluff like Evanovich. Kar owned and devoured pretty much the entire 12th grade literary read requirements before she even hit high school!

It's difficult for us to browse our shelves for a book that we haven't yet read.

And I am probably the ONLY parent to ever ground my child from her books and be asked by teachers that she NOT bring a book to class every single day! Poor teachers!
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Window seat

Everyone needs a friend who will take the worst disaster of your life and make you laugh. Thank goodness!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Happy Hallmark Holiday!

Today is Mother's Day.

We don't do Mother's Day. Technically, shouldn't I be the one giving my kid presents? Without her, I wouldn't be a mother!

Call me selfish, but I'd rather my kid love me every day and show it whenever, instead of thinking it's OK to save it all for the second Sunday in May.

Yep, don't celebrate our wedding anniversary or Mother's Day or Valentine's Day or Sweetest Day. It sounds cynical except I believe every day is special for a mom, wife and woman in love.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

I'd do it all again...

Eleven years ago today, Rick married me.

At 4 p.m., on beautiful, sunny and warm Saturday, May 10, 1997, Lisa walked with Scott, plus 2 more bridesmaids and 2 more groomsmen.

Our 6-year-old, adorable kids held hands in front of us as we all went down the aisle.

And Nina, my other best friend who passed away just 2 months earlier, was our guardian angel. She made sure the whole thing went off without a hitch.

It was one helluva party!

Today, we headed up to my inlaws for a family party at "Grandma on the lake"'s house. Yesterday, we were told that Rick's dad's cancer is back. It's not good, since treatment from the last "cured" bout ended in January.

Our thoughts were focused there, until about 1/2 way into the 2.5-hour drive, when I looked at Rick and said, "OMG! It's our anniversary!" Glanced at clock. "And we didn't even remember it til almost noon!"

Kar laughed in our guilty silence. Then he grabbed my hand and kissed it. "I'm no more thankful for you today because it's our anniversary, than any other day. Every day we have together is a celebration for me."

Who needs Hallmark after that?

Too bad with all of Rick's siblings and parents and Grandma being there, we didn't get another drunken performance of "My ding-aling" from his younger brother.

But I think Nina is still our guardian angel.
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Happy TGIF!

1. Have you ever been told you look/sound like a celebrity? Nope.
2. If yes, who? NA
3. Have you ever met a real celebrity?Yep.
4. If yes, who? I shook hands with then-President Clinton. That's hard to beat, face-to-face. Thanks to Bethany, I've spoken on the phone with Matt Roloff, before he got his own TV show. Through various jobs, I've spoken with Anita Baker (very sweet), Aretha Franklin, Dr. Jack Kevorkian (odd), Carl Brashear and many, many others, including several Detroit Tigers and Pistons. And many others.
5. In honor of birthdays (Lisa-5/7 and Bethany 5/15), what was your best birthday? When I turned 30 (back in 2000), Bethany surprised me with a party at her work, complete with balloons and a custom-made/decorated banana cake w/cream cheese frosting. It was awesome! That night, Rick wired our new house for the 2 phone lines, which had just been connected. 1 for a landline, 1 for The Net. I also remember a very fun day in Frankenmuth with Nina, Sabrina and Lisa for my 25th. Us girls ate dinner at Red Lobster in Flint. The Rick and Sheila plaque is still proudly displayed in my living room!

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Just a little common sense

With the price of gas, shouldn't more states be passing lower speed laws?

With the price of gas, shouldn't PEOPLE have the brains to go slower?
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY, LISA!

My dearest friend "Lulu,"

I am thankful to call you MORE than just my best friend. You were instrumental in changing my life in many ways. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am today.

On this very day 11 years ago (Wednesday, May 7, 1997), you spent your birthday -- YOUR SPECIAL DAY -- travelling to Michigan for my upcoming wedding. You never complained. You never thought twice about it.

There are so many special memories for us! Nina, Mio, Atlanta, 3 a.m. breakfast runs, midnight trips to Walmart, Secret Santa, WebTV, blogs, etc.

And I am truly glad that you have forged such a wonderful life in Suburbia. You positively glow now!

Please be sure to tell your parents "thank you" from me. Without them, I wouldn't have you! Munchkin wouldn't have her "Aunt." And the world wouldn't be as good of a place, either.

BTW, your Southern accent is damn cute!

Luv ya! ~~ "WOS"
The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

It's never too late to say, "I'm sorry."

It was an awesome feeling to actually apologize to someone after all these years. Completely unexpected to him, but appreciated.

He definitely deserved to hear that I was still embarrassed and ashamed after nearly 20 years. The statute of limitations never ran out on my guilt.

And I hope we can maintain our friendship again.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)

Peanut M&Ms to the rescue!

Today was one of those (extra-large ice cap, jumbo-bag peanut M&Ms, crunchy Cheetos, extra butter and parmasean breadsticks and a slice of pepperoni pizza) days. There are certain foods that truly do comfort me in very stressful situations. It's hard not having a vice sometimes!

I hate getting a letter in the Friday mail that I don't see until 9:30 p.m. and I cannot do a thing about until Monday! Geez!

Thank goodness for The Net. Thorough research has assuaged most of my fears.

Plus, my emergency bag of peanut M&Ms needs to be replaced.

The Last of Sheila (Coburn)